Designer Comedy

The blurb for Urzila Carlson’s show, Poise Control, suggests it’s a lesson in modern etiquette. But what Carlson really has in mind is how to deal with fusty notions and bigoted behaviour. “There’s a very fine line between being politically correct and being a lawyer,” Carlson quips.

The openly lesbian star was prompted to write Poise Control after she and her partner became parents to a daughter in 2013. “My wife and I went into the hospital. She was having the baby. The midwife came in and she kind of looked at us and she goes, ‘Are you sisters?’ I said, ‘No, we’re not.’ And she goes, ‘Are you friends?’ And I said, ‘No.’ I said, ‘This is my partner.’ She just looked at us and then she said — very polite — ‘I’m a Christian, I can’t do this,’ and she just turned around and walked out of the room. Then about 30 seconds later somebody else came running in and they go, ‘I’m so sorry, [the midwife] had a diabetic episode’ (laughs). I go, ‘Is that what you call it these days?’”

"She just looked at us and then she said — very polite — ‘I’m a Christian, I can’t do this,’"

The hospital encouraged Carlson to pursue a discrimination case against the midwife. “I said, ‘No, we won’t press any charges because, although I don’t agree with her and I think she was being a complete arsehole, I would much rather that she be honest and go, ‘I’m not comfortable with it.’ That just got me thinking – there’s so many things that we just push through and we don’t wanna say anything ‘cause we don’t want a scene, but wouldn’t it be better to just go, ‘You know what, I’m not comfortable with this’?”

Carlson had already established herself as a graphic designer in South Africa when in 2006 she decided to migrate to NZ. Two years on, she stumbled into a comedy career after a triumphant debut in NZ’s RAW comedy quest. To this day, Carlson takes an interest in design – especially show posters. “I’m a horror to design for!” she admits.

The award-winner welcomes all the creative outlets comedy has brought her, from penning a column in NZ Women’s Weekly to appearing on TV (here in Oz, Spicks And Specks). “Everything basically is an opportunity – and I’ve really been grabbing every opportunity. Honestly, I’ll do anything, ‘cause it’s such a new world to me still.”

Carlson does get misty-eyed about South Africa: “Nothing makes a patriot like leaving.” She hopes to tour South Africa with her stand-up – and eventually accompany her daughter on a visit. “I definitely wanna go back. I’m not done with it at all. I said this morning, when I woke up, ‘I miss South Africa, I miss the people.’ It’s a beautiful country.”